Tag Archives: taken

The Non-Stop Drinking Game

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Let’s face it. Non-Stop is not an easy film to sit through. But hand me a bottle of Jägermeister (large, please) and an abundance of shot glasses and it would be a different matter entirely. So, for your enjoyment and the promise of your sanity, here’s the rules to the Non-Stop Drinking Game. I’ll meet you on its Home Ent release date with a sleeping bag and a couple of paracetamol. Bottoms up.

DRINK WHENEVER:

– Bill’s family (that’s Neeson, obvs) is threatened.

– An Oscar-winning (or nominated) actor says a line that makes you want to blow your brains out. This includes Scoot McNairy, Corey Stoll and Shea Whigham who totes have it in them to win a gold statue.

– Bar Paly is treated as horrifically generic.

– You are told how much money needs to be transferred.

– The network goes down.

– The network goes up again.

– You’re confused if the network is up or down.

– One of the air hostesses looks like an extra from Star Trek.

– You think you know who the culprit is.

– Expositional dialogue is spoken. Hell, finish your drink.

– You are envious of Lupita’s amazing guns.

– Lady Mary looks concerned.

– You forget this isn’t Taken.

– Lupita says something in a flawless accent and makes everyone else look rubbish. Cheers!

– You laugh at the name of the airline.

– Corey Stoll looks like he means business.

– Bill uses predictive text in a ridiculous way. E.G.: He types out ‘passengers’, but can’t be arsed with something shorter.

– You laugh, but aren’t meant to.

– Shea Whigham is criminally wasted. Again.

– The camera wants you to suspect somebody.

– Someone makes a generic terrorism reference.

– You forgot Linus Roache existed.

– Someone says ‘wanker’. Us Brits can’t stop.

– Julianne Moore makes you question your sexuality. Females only.

– You stop caring.

– Something nonsensical happens. Down your drink, then pour another. Down that one too – you need to get through this somehow.

– The passengers putting their hands in the air look like they’re having more fun than you.

VERDICT: 2/5

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Review: Out Of The Furnace (2013)

Film Title: Out of the Furnace
Director: Scott Cooper.

Cast: Christian Bale, Casey Affleck, Woody Harrelson, Zoe Saldana, Forest Whitaker, Willem Dafoe.

Certificate: 15.

With only 2009’s CRAZY HEART to his name, Scott Cooper’s OUT OF THE FURNACE struggles to disguise its relatively green writer-director. What could have been an intelligent, tense revenge thriller unfortunately soon unravels as a redneck version of TAKEN; a paint by numbers and completely unremarkable affair that signposts any shock tactics from a mile off. However, with Ridley Scott and Leonardo DiCaprio (originally set to direct and star) onboard as producers, it’s hardly surprising it attracted such impressive talent.

After a tragic car accident puts Russell Baze (Christian Bale) behind bars, he returns to a place where everything is fundamentally the same, but inescapably different. His younger, Iraq-serving brother Rodney (Casey Affleck) seeks solace in physical bouts, while girlfriend Lena (Zoe Saldana) is far more standoffish than hoped. But Rodney’s addiction to the boxing ring is more than just a hobby as he finds himself sucked into a dangerous world of underground fighting, headed by the nefarious Harlan DeGroat (Woody Harrelson). When little bro mysteriously goes missing and local police chief Wesley (Forest Whitaker) is slow to act, Russell decides to take matters into his own hands. Continue reading

What I’m Watching – August 2012

This list only includes films I watched for the first time this month. My most recent viewing is the top entry:

Now Is Good (Dir: Ol Parker, 2012) **

Untouchable (Intouchables) (Dir: Olivier Nakache, Eric Toledano, 2011) *****

Happy, Happy (Sykt Lykkelig) (Dir: Anne Sewitsky, 2010) ****

Detention (Dir: Joseph Kahn, 2011) ***

The Sound Of My Voice (Dir: Zal Batmanglij, 2011) ****

Flashbacks Of A Fool (Dir: Baillie Walsh, 2008) **

The Loved Ones (Dir: Sean Byrne, 2009) ***

Romeos (Dir: Sabine Bernardi, 2011) ****

Hysteria (Dir: Tanya Wexler, 2011) ***

On The Road (Dir: Walter Salles, 2012) **

Tabu (Dir: Miguel Gomes, 2012) *****

Circumstance (Dir: Maryam Keshavarz, 2011) ****

Samsara (Dir: Ron Fricke, 2011) *****

Love Crime (Crime D’Amour) (Dir: Alain Corneau, 2010) **

Page Eight (Dir: David Hare, 2011) ***

Damsels In Distress (Dir: Whit Stillman, 2011) ****

Predator (Dir: John McTiernan, 1987) ***

The Bourne Legacy (Dir: Tony Gilroy, 2012) ***

Brave (Dir: Mark Andrews, Brenda Chapman, 2012) ****

Taken (Dir: Pierre Morel, 2008) ***