Tag Archives: lupita nyong’o

The Non-Stop Drinking Game

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Let’s face it. Non-Stop is not an easy film to sit through. But hand me a bottle of Jägermeister (large, please) and an abundance of shot glasses and it would be a different matter entirely. So, for your enjoyment and the promise of your sanity, here’s the rules to the Non-Stop Drinking Game. I’ll meet you on its Home Ent release date with a sleeping bag and a couple of paracetamol. Bottoms up.

DRINK WHENEVER:

– Bill’s family (that’s Neeson, obvs) is threatened.

– An Oscar-winning (or nominated) actor says a line that makes you want to blow your brains out. This includes Scoot McNairy, Corey Stoll and Shea Whigham who totes have it in them to win a gold statue.

– Bar Paly is treated as horrifically generic.

– You are told how much money needs to be transferred.

– The network goes down.

– The network goes up again.

– You’re confused if the network is up or down.

– One of the air hostesses looks like an extra from Star Trek.

– You think you know who the culprit is.

– Expositional dialogue is spoken. Hell, finish your drink.

– You are envious of Lupita’s amazing guns.

– Lady Mary looks concerned.

– You forget this isn’t Taken.

– Lupita says something in a flawless accent and makes everyone else look rubbish. Cheers!

– You laugh at the name of the airline.

– Corey Stoll looks like he means business.

– Bill uses predictive text in a ridiculous way. E.G.: He types out ‘passengers’, but can’t be arsed with something shorter.

– You laugh, but aren’t meant to.

– Shea Whigham is criminally wasted. Again.

– The camera wants you to suspect somebody.

– Someone makes a generic terrorism reference.

– You forgot Linus Roache existed.

– Someone says ‘wanker’. Us Brits can’t stop.

– Julianne Moore makes you question your sexuality. Females only.

– You stop caring.

– Something nonsensical happens. Down your drink, then pour another. Down that one too – you need to get through this somehow.

– The passengers putting their hands in the air look like they’re having more fun than you.

VERDICT: 2/5

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Review: 12 Years A Slave (2013)

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Director: Steve McQueen.

Starring: Chiwetel Ejiofor, Michael Fassbender, Lupita Nyong’o, Benedict Cumberbatch, Paul Dano, Adepero Oduye, Brad Pitt, Garret Dillahunt, Sarah Paulson, Alfre Woodard, Paul Giamatti.

Running Time: 134 minutes.

Certificate: 15.

Synopsis: Based on the true story of Solomon Northup (Chiwetel Ejiofor), a free Black man who was captured and sold into slavery. His struggle to keep his identity and stay alive are made even more difficult when he finds himself bought by slaveowner Edwin Epps (Michael Fassbender).

Following on from haunting, visceral Fassbender machines, HUNGER and SHAME, Steve McQueen’s latest, incredibly raw triumph grabs you by the scruff of the neck and demands your heart and soul. 2013 delivered two very different tales of Black oppression courtesy of Tarantino and Spielberg, but this nigh-on flawless retelling of Solomon Northup’s plight is the one to beat in 2014.

Finding art in the smallest of things, McQueen’s proclivity to linger where others would call cut fascinates and enchants – notably in an incredibly tense scene that finds Solomon’s life hanging in the balance whilst others go about their daily tasks. Cinematographer Sean Bobbitt once again melts into the director’s vision, creating numerous iconic moments from the spraying of fresh blood at the hand of Edwin Epps’ whip to a journey following Solomon through the woods. Malickian interludes serve to measure the years passed, but refrain from self-indulgence, instead letting us appreciate minor details and transforming 12 YEARS A SLAVE into a transcendent, necessitated rewatch. Continue reading